A Crazy Few Weeks

The prodigal daughter returns! Hooray!

It’s been a crazy few weeks my friends. Crazy. This Friday marks my official month at the internship and it’s daunting and amazing at the same time. There are incredible people who I am learning from and so many people I like. The office environment is unlike any that I’ve worked before and I can see myself both being comfortable and uncomfortable for a long time to come.

The past few weeks I’ve been both inspired and exhausted. More so exhausted, but it’s funny how exhaustion works. How even when feeling tired and crabby and uninspired, you can still rev the engines and move.  It’s also funny, how right when you’re in the thick of things and you’re on the phone after avoiding calling the credit counseling company, you break into tears and then feel the release of admittance and a feeling of new hope. And then it’s funny that you find someone who needs help walking his dog and is willing to pay you money to spend something like 15-20 minutes in the good, or bad, weather feeling good about getting time to work out your body all the while stopping a dog from dragging you around and attacking squirrels.  And then comes the moment you think, “I need to get a ticket to the 2012 Stationery Show”, and a woman you donated to last year emails you and tells you she has a ticket for you to the Stationery show and wants to take you to dinner as a thank you! It’s also funny, how just in the moment when you just want quiet and to sleep in your own bed, you find your house free of the one person you can’t stand the most, but busting to the brim with two of your favorite people (one roommate and her boyfriend), a dog that peed on your cable box and tore into bags, and two old friends: one from high school, and one not quite as old, but still an old friend who you met nine years ago in a pub in Dublin on St. Patrick’s Day and have only had slight communication with thanks to social media since, but whose visit feeds your soul.

And then you add in all the other things (and also the first tense instead of the third)- the odd job requests I’ve gotten, even though they’ve fallen through. The fact that my business and my talent are on the radar of friends and Etsians.  The email and subsequent scheduling of dates to do sessions on paper and card making at the NY Public Library throughout the summer (more details coming soon!). Oh, yeah, working on orders in between all of this, having to rely on my printer for simple copies, AND having my products launched on a website called A8 New York, focused on style for men (more details coming soon, on this, too!). I also paid for advertising opportunities on two websites:The Mogul Mom and WeddingInviteLove and one eblast: The {NewNew} e-blast announcing our Calvalcade.   I also got word that I was accepted for my first market of the year: Spring Crafts in Chelsea and so I’m gearing up and thinking about new things to design for the show.  I’m also working with a photographer on my Etsy team on some new wedding invitations specific to NYC (more details soon!).  And there’s the blogging. While I haven’t been blogging here, I’ve made a few appearances on the Etsy team blog and I am writing a blog for this Friday on my friend Kerry’s blog. I’ve also been involved with various donation (I accept up to four donation requests a year) projects, tonight being one of the big ones, where I’ve donated custom stationery to be auctioned at a fundraising event for on of my favorite organizations, Earthwatch Institute.

And then of course, we have to add in even more personal things, like knowing that I’m going to have to move come July 15th and deciding what is the best option and where do I want to go. Oh, yeah, and I saw my friend’s apartment over the weekend because he thinks it is just too perfect that I need to move when his apartment becomes available.  There’s also the guy I like probably more than I should, yet he responds to it and so I’m happy about that. There’s the slight back pain, but still not as bad as it was during the other 9-to-5. There’s also my feeling tired ALL the time, but I think I may know why now- Vitamin D deficiency and the fact that I haven’t REALLY stopped moving since March 20th (I am taking Vitamin D now and trying to relax a bit in the coming days),  but over all my health is in good standing and I can’t complain.

I found out at the beginning of this month that I didn’t get into the grad school program I had applied for at the end of January. I’m planning to write a whole blog about this later this month, maybe even this week, but I can tell you this, for now, with everything going on, it was a relief to read my flimsy letter telling me I am rejected. It also opened a whole new door for whether to pursue Japan or not THIS year, or save it for next. This ties into the paragraph above with me trying to decide whether I want to move into my friend’s apartment, how confident I feel about landing a full-time gig at my current place of internship employment, and how positive I feel over all about the changes headed my way in the next 2.75 months.

All together now, “Whew, I’m/ she’s  busy!”

That, my friends is what has taken place in the almost month (3 days until it is official) since I’ve written on this blog and started this new adventure.  I am and have taken quite a few risks and I know that there are going to be more. Many, many more. For the first time though, I feel relaxed. I feel relaxed because even with the amount of changes going on in my life and the feeling that I could sleep for hours – I feel alive, happy, and determined. I even make sure I pick up flowers every Monday from the Farmers Market on my way into work to liven up my desk. That’s how good I feel. Still though, I wish I could run away from my fears, but I’m not; I’m calling them up individually and accepting what they say and am going to fight to prove them wrong. That really is ALL I can do now in regards to the fear. I can only knock them down and make shit happen.

So that’s it. That my way of explaining where I’ve been. It’s my way of sharing the ups and down and the excitement and fears. That’s my way of getting back into blogging about S2 Stationery and Design and myself.  Let’s roll!

Oh, and wherever you’ve been or are this past month, please know I’m sending you positive energy and hope for many good things to come. It’s the moment that counts (even though I lose focus of that daily) and how you process the moment.  It’s good to be back writing. More to come!

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s2 stationery & designs

A rule-breaking designer, artist & entrepreneur who's passionate about paper and handcrafting stationery. I also write, travel, and focus on eco + social good.

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